A college professor, an avowed Atheist, was teaching his class.
He shocked several of his students when he flatly stated he was going to prove there was no God.
Addressing the ceiling he shouted: "God, if you are real, then I want you to knock me off this platform. I'll give you 15 minutes!"
The lecture room fell silent. You could have heard a pin fall.
Ten minutes went by. Again he taunted God, saying, "Here I am, God. I'm still waiting."
His count-down got down to the last couple of minutes when a Marine - just released from active duty and newly registered in the class - walked up to the professor, hit him full force in the face, and sent him tumbling from his lofty platform.
The professor was out cold! At first, the students were shocked and babbled in confusion. The young Marine took a seat in the front row and sat silent.
The class fell silent...waiting.
Eventually, the professor came to, shaken he looked at the young Marine in the front row. When the professor regained his senses and could speak he asked: "What's the matter with you? Why did you do that?"
"God was busy so he sent the Marines."
7 comments:
found this on the net...thought you would like it
WOULDN'T IT BE GREAT TO TURN ON THE TV AND HEAR ANY U.S.
PRESIDENT, DEMOCRAT OR REPUBLICAN GIVE THE FOLLOWING SPEECH?
My Fellow Americans: As you all know, the defeat of Iraq regime has been completed.
Since congress does not want to spend any more money on this war, our mission in Iraq is complete.
This morning I gave the order for a complete removal of all
American forces from Iraq . This action will be complete within 30 days. It is now time to begin the reckoning.
Before me, I have two lists. One list contains the names of
countries which have stood by our side during the Iraq conflict. This list is short. The United Kingdom , Spain , Bulgaria , Australia , and Poland are some of the countries listed there.
The other list contains everyone not on the first list. Most of
the world's nations are on that list. My press secretary will be
distributing copies of both lists later this evening.
Let me start by saying that effective immediately, foreign aid
to those nations on List 2 ceases immediately and indefinitely. The money saved during the first year alone will pretty much pay for the costs of the Iraqi war.
The American people are no longer going to pour money into
third world Hell-holes and watch those government leaders grow fat on corruption.
Need help with a famine? Wrestling with an epidemic? Call France.
In the future,together with Congress, I will work to redirect
this money toward solving the vexing social problems we still have at home. On that note, a word to terrorist organizations. Screw with us and we will hunt you down and eliminate you and all your friends from the face of the earth.
Thirsting for a gutsy country to terrorize? Try France , or
maybe China .
I am ordering the immediate severing of diplomatic relations with France, Germany, and Russia. Thanks for all your help comrades. We are retiring from NATO as well.
Bon chance, mes amis.
I have instructed the Mayor of New York City to begin towing the many UN diplomatic vehicles located in Manhattan with more than two unpaid parking tickets to sites where those vehicles will be stripped, shredded and crushed. I don't care about whatever treaty pertains to this. You creeps have tens of thousands of unpaid tickets. Pay those tickets tomorrow or watch your precious Benzes, Beamers and limos be
turned over to some of the finest chop shops in the world.
I love New York .
A special note to our neighbors. Canada is on List 2. Since we
are likely to be seeing a lot more of each other, you folks might want to try not to agravate us for a change.
Mexico is also on List 2. President Fox and his entire corrupt
government really need an attitude adjustment. I will have a couple extra tank and infantry divisions sitting around. Guess where I am going to put em? Yep, border security. So start doing something with your oil.
Oh, by the way, the United States is abrogating the NAFTA
treaty - starting now.
We are tired of the one-way highway. Immediately, we'll be
drilling for oil in Alaska - which will take care of this country's oil needs for decades to come. If you're an environmentalist who opposes this decision, I refer you to List 2 above: pick a country and move there. They care.
It is time for America to focus on its own welfare and its own
citizens. Some will accuse us of isolationism.. I answer them by
saying, "darn tootin."
Nearly a century of trying to help folks live a decent life
around the world has only earned us the undying enmity of just about everyone on the planet. It is time to eliminate hunger in America . It is time to eliminate homelessness in America . It is time to eliminate World Cup Soccer from America . To the nations on List 1, a final thought.
Thanks guys. We owe you and we won't forget.
To the nations on List 2,a final thought: You might want to
learn to speak Arabic.
God bless America Thank you and good night.
If you can read this, thank a teacher. If you are reading it
in English, thank a soldier.
GET 'ER DONE!
God told me that he (God) doesn't exsist.
Anonymous 2:04
LMAO I loved that and agree with every single bit of it!!!
BTW...the...
If you can read this, thank a teacher. If you are reading it
in English, thank a soldier
is a bumper sticker I have on my car lol
God Bless America!!!
Morgon did you get the packages sent off?
You bet I did Tammy!!!
I sent off 4 of them yesterday.
Hooah and Merry Christmas!!!!
lol
Yah right. I have heard that before. "Your package is in the mail".
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